The Uneven Bars

After months of listening to the Obama administration’s ideas of “Change”, I think I finally see what they are shooting for. If everyone will take a few moments to clear your mind of all sane thoughts or any common sense you are wastefully hanging on to, the next few years will be a lot less painful. Why don’t we all “get on board” with the new “values” system Obama is pushing so we can wipe out all differences between American citizens? I propose that we start with our school system. (We all know that the schools could use a little change.)


For starters, let’s get rid of that nasty title of “principal” and replace it with “Education Czar.” Ahhh, there we go sounds better already. We can call the teachers Czars also. From now on when Czars give out an assignment such as a written report, a student who does not want to participate will not be forced to comply. When the assignment is due, the Czar will take up all of the papers from students who chose to participate. The Czar will then grade the papers and divide the average of all the graded reports, this average will be distributed among the students equally. The students that chose not to participate will also receive the same grade as those that did participate. This way no student has his feelings hurt and everyone shares the same reward come report card day.

For recess we can march the children to the gymnasium. Once all of the students who feel like participating have dressed out, the coaches can do their standardized testing for all of the school’s sports teams. Football, baseball, soccer etc. Students will be judged on their athletic ability and hard work as before, but now ALL children will make the teams. All team rosters will be made up of the ENTIRE school population. (This way no one feels left out and gets their feelings hurt) It will not matter if you actually play in the games as there will be no score kept. (Once again to help with the feelings) At the end of the season, all students who played, and those who didn’t, will be awarded trophies for their “vision of winning.”

Later at the graduation ceremonies, you will notice that there is no valedictorian. (As this too may offend others) Instead, every student will receive a yellow sash to wear for their classes achievements. We will do away with the SAT and ACT tests, as these exams tend to stress students.

As our new graduates prepare to enter the work force, they will find that a resume and list of scholastic achievements are no longer necessary. You will simply wait at home until the government selects your number for the next available job. (Don’t worry; we will all be equally qualified to do every job.)

STOP! Is this what you want? In a very near future, a slightly diluted version of this reality is what you will wake up to. We are NOT all equal in every way. My oldest son has excelled faster academically than my youngest son, and my youngest son has become more of an athlete than his older brother. Some people are harder workers and some are more succesful businessmen than others. This is LIFE. Get over it. Get used to it. Sometimes reality is harsh and cruel. We can only “sugarcoat” reality for so long before the truth comes out and kicks someone in the butt. Obama’s Change is not an acceptable reality for the American people. Are you going to accept his new “Reality” or do you need a “Spoonful of Sugar?”